After a lot of angst and fear and frustration and introspection, we have decided not to move forward with the service dog organization we had previously stated. Although we made this decision a short while ago, I feel ready to talk about the reasons why we came to that decision. We are still pursuing a service dog; we have many leads, and are taking out time making sure that any organization we work with is right.
We had questions. While we got answers, they all felt as though the intent was to get us to sign the contract, not meet our needs. Why did they need a video of Charlotte walking to approve us? She walks normally. "You can wait until later to send that".
Why can't we have our veterinarian examine the dog before we take possession?
Why were we encouraged to apply and sign and pay, when we were clear about the variables?
Ultimately, it just wasn't right. It wasn't right to pair her with a puppy when the purpose was to train the dog to help someone who needs it now. It wasn't right to ignore how complicated and vague her future is by trying to force a solution that has a finite date. I should have trusted my gut when it told me "it's too early to apply, she's still too little".
I do not believe that any fault, here, lies with the organization. They were operating based on their own procedures and best practices. I hope that they are, in fact, ethical. I have no way to measure that.
I do believe though, that since we have time to wait for her to need help, we have time to make a nuanced, better informed decision. We have time to make sure that the funds that were so lovingly and generously donated will not be used, even accidentally, for something that doesn't have the maximum chance for success.
I will continue to update as the service dog journey progresses. We are, as always, so grateful to you all.